חוות דעת על הכתיבה שלי?

i think, that as some point, i will kill myself just to end this scary loop.
i want to feel something else but this endless sadness. i want to cut myself so i can fell pain, ill try to laugh and smile but this happiness will be fake.
right now i fell like a marionette and i dont know why, am i a human at all? well, yes, probably. i dont see much differences between me and an old dall.
(לא אובדנית סטיפס אין מה לדאוג)